Brokeback Extravaganza

WARNING!

Must have the sense of humor to take a joke and not be offended easily.

Don't let the title fool you, I have yet to see Brokeback Mountain, but it was the topic of conversation, punchlines and nonsense all night last night. That and Michael Jackson happened to creep in there too. As much as I love MJ, it's almost impossible to escape the jokes and I will not repeat any of them. LOL. However, there are a couple other jokes I may tell at the end.

I don't think I have laughed so much in my life like I did last night. My Hubby and I play in a pool league every Monday night and yesterday was more like a night at Yuk Yuk's. I laughed so hard, there were a couple of times I thought I was going to shoot this baby out of me.

The main topic was Brokeback Mountain. I can't remember how that became the focus of the night, but I was amazed that spending 2-3 hours talking/joking about it never spoiled anything for me. With that being said, I don't think I can take the movie the way it's supposed to be delivered with what was said, but I will try my best. LMAO.

One of the guys on the other team (We'll call him 'O') was cracking the jokes left, right & center. He reminds me of Howie Mandel with the quick wit and goofy sense of humor. Well, last night the spotlight was on him. It was great, because we were all getting into it with the quick comments and silliness, especially my husband. Oh my, if you knew him you would know that he isn't one to start the jokes (unless he's SUPER comfy with you) he usually sits there and laughs but, they were flying out of his mouth like there was no tomorrow. Bloody hilarious.

After 'O' rambled on with his jokes, he told us that if we can put the "gay stuff" to the side the movie is actually pretty good. I told him that I have no problem with anything gay and that I watch both Queer As Folk & The L Word (LOVE THEM!!!). He shot up and yelled out loud in the middle of the pub,

"Oh my gawd sister, Queer As Folk is the SHIT!!!"

I almost fell off my chair, mainly because not many straight guys will even admit to watching it, nevermind get all excited that someone else watched it too. I then went on to tell him how sad I am that it's over, etc. (See previous post)

'O' went on to talk about watching the movie 3 or 4 times and was explaining that some parts, if heard in stereo, would trip us out. One part being when some dude spits in the palm of his hand. 'O' compared it to watching Top Gun in stereo. ROFL. I'm not sure where he was going with this, seeing as I haven't seen the movie yet, but the way he was telling it was hilarious. All of the sudden he blurts out,

"Come to think of it, there were like a thousand sheep out there and this guy decided to screw his buddy? They EACH had enough sheep out there to have one a day!"

Then Brad pipes up and says,

"Maybe the sheep were all female and the guys weren't into that."

I tell ya, they were KILLING ME! After the gay jokes subsided somewhat, the sex jokes came into play. Everywhere from small units ('O' made fun of his own) to Michael Jackson. Being that MJ was the newer topic, the jokes were...um...dirty (to say the least) and may be found offensive.

Here is a NON MJ one for now...
Remember...this is NOT MY JOKE!

Q: What's difficult about having sex with twenty-eight year olds?

A: There's twenty of them.

Told you...It was bad and only got worse as the night progressed. That was one of the cleaner jokes.

Then 'O' was talking about popcorn and how he can have sex faster than popcorn can be made. GOOD THING TO ADMIT OUT LOUD BUDDY! ROFLMAO. He went on saying that she'd have to get naked while he puts the popcorn in the microwave, once he hits the start button, off they go to do their business. Once the 3-4 minutes are up, he would find a near by sock or t-shirt (whichever is closer) to use as a clean up tool, then they would go watch Brokeback Mountain. ROFL. What a clown! Another one he shouted out loud was "If you can't swallow it, you're sleeping in it!"

This was only SOME of the craziness that was my night.

Hope none were offended.